PRACTICAL WAYS TO DAILY BUILD CONFIDENCE
I Work each day with many clients who wish to bolster their confidence and during this therapeutic time I give them practical tips to assist their progress here are a few to help you on your way,
1 Maintaining good eye contact shows you feel confident and believe in what you’re saying. Body language expert Robert Phipps suggests “hold eye contact around 60-70 percent of the time. By doing this, you won’t make the other person feel self-conscious. Instead, it will make them feel comfortable and relaxed in your company”.
2 GET JIGGY WITH IT Touching your partner and having sex more often releases feel-good chemicals that boost your self-esteem and sexual confidence. Sexologist Dr Gabrielle Morrissey reveals “sex is a natural mild anti-depressant, it actually revitalises you.
3 SPEAK UP Have fun with words and expand your vocabulary. Reach for that dusty old dictionary and learn a new word every week, then slip it into a conversation. Add words like “love” and “enjoy” to your sentences and this will make you sound like a person bursting with happiness and enthusiasm. Don’t be scared to project your voice either, confident people demand to be heard.
4 LOVE YOUR BODY Do you constantly beat yourself up about your looks? Motivational consultant Claire Walton advises “observe a friend or even a celebrity who has the same body shape as you but excludes confidence. Watch their body language, eye contact and communication style. Check this against your own style and look to mirror some of their techniques”
5 KNOW YOUR GOALS AT WORK Confidence here comes from knowing what you’re good at and why, according to Suzy Greaves, a career coach from Big Leap Coaching. “When you appear confident about your skills, you inspire confidence and people promote you”, she says “Write a list of everything you’re good at on PostpIt notes and stick them on your bathroom mirror so you’ll see it before you go to work”.
6 GO SHOPPING It isn’t called retail therapy for nothing. Pop into a big store like John Lewis, Sports shops, Topshop and Dorothy Perkins to find out about their personal shopper services
7 STAND UP FOR YOURSELF Your posture speaks volumes about your confidence. You never see anyone slouching on the red carpet do you? Work on improving the abdominal and back muscles that surround the core area of the body and walk tall. Niki Wibrow a celebrity personal trainer says “try martial arts, yoga or Pilates”
8 GET YOUR HEAD STRAIGHT Keeping it level when talking to someone makes you see a confident communicator. Body language expert Robert Phipps says “You can also use this straight head position when you want to be authoritative and what you are saying to be taken seriously” but when you want to be friendly and show that you are listening with interest, tilt your head just a little to one side or another
9 SPEAK YOUR MIND AND OPEN YOUR EARS Listening to what your partner has to say and getting them to listen what YOU have to say helps build confidence in your relationship. Psychotherapist Malcolm Stern suggests “set aside a period of time when you speak without being interrupted. Once you or your partner has finished talking relate back to them what they’ve just said”.
10 FIND YOUR GRAND PASSION Career coach Suzy Greaves explains “You’re naturally good at what you love doing. The more you excel at something, the more confident you become”. But how do you identify your passion? Suzy asks her clients these questions.
- What was your childhood dream before everyone told you that what you wanted to do was unrealistic?
- Who did you envy recently and why? Envy is a great tool to tell us what we really want.
- What are you naturally good at?
What do you love doing that makes time slip by effortlessly while you’re doing it?